When I Move With The World: Imitation and Authenticity

Where's the line between being influenced and losing myself?

📍Manila, Philippines

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I noticed that I move when others move.

I realized this most strangely - at the supermarket. I was standing in front of a shelf, absorbed in reading labels, when suddenly I found myself taking a step aside. "Why did I just move?" I wondered, as if waking from a dream. I looked around and discovered that someone else had passed through the aisle, stopped to read labels like me, and then, when they moved, I moved too. Without thinking. Without planning. I just moved with them like a shadow.

And since I've been paying attention, I see it happening all the time. Especially in the supermarket, when movements are automatic and I'm focused on my shopping list or the product in front of me. I'm not aware of my steps, but apparently, I've always been aware of other people's steps.

There's also that awkward dance we all know - when two people meet in a narrow corridor and try to make way for each other, only to move again and again in the same direction. I decided to solve this problem simply - I go first, immediately when someone signals me to pass. I leave politeness behind and just move to avoid this complicated dance.

But this opened up a bigger question for me - where is the line between learning from people and imitating them? What's the difference between the two?

I once wrote that I am the sum of all the people I've met. From each one, I took something that stayed with me, things I liked and probably also things I didn't like so much. I wrote that I am an "empty cup," learning from everyone, never thinking I know everything.

But if I imitate everyone around me, then who am I really? What remains in me that is only mine?

This realization made me uncomfortable. Perhaps because I want to feel that I'm not being "dragged along," not "influenced," and not "imitating." I tell myself, "Hold your ground" - don't move when someone else moves.

It's probably related to how I got used to doing what I'm told, letting others decide, not asking myself. And now, even after I thought I'd gotten rid of this, I discover remnants of old behavior.

There's a difference between being influenced and being an imitator. Influence is part of life - we live in society, and we learn from each other. There are people who influence us more, whom we feel connected to, whom we want to learn from, and draw inspiration from. But automatic imitation? That's a different story.

Automatic imitation, like the unconscious movement in the supermarket, indicates that we're not completely in our bodies, not fully connected to who we are. We act out of habit or out of a desire to fit in, to blend in, not to stand out too much.

The fact that I identified this, even if late, already means I can change it. Now it's no longer a subconscious behavior - I shine a light on it every time it appears, and politely ask it: "What do you think you're doing here?"

Perhaps the most important part of authenticity is the ability to distinguish between what is truly ours and what we've adopted without noticing. Being influenced is okay, learning is great, and even imitating at the beginning of the path is part of the learning process. But ultimately, what matters is identifying our inner voice, hearing it clearly above all the noise, and consciously deciding what we choose to adopt and what not.

Hold your ground. I remind myself, as if I'm guarding the most precious threshold of my home - my personality. Not letting anything break in without an invitation. Being aware of my movements, my thoughts, and my decisions. Because only then can I truly be me.

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Who Am I? | The Journey Through Time | The Daily Journey

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