The Massage
Seeing the world through someone else’s eyes.
📍Da Nang, Vietnam
On my first evening in Da Nang, after sleeping most of the day and having breakfast at 4 PM, I ventured out to explore my new city center. The streets were full of life, and while wandering down the main avenue, I stumbled upon a massage spa.
I didn't think twice – continuing my birthday gift tradition to myself. The sign displayed 470,000 dong per hour (about $19), and when one of the staff approached me, I asked, probably from habit acquired over recent months, "Is that your best price?"
She smiled and offered to do it for 350,000 (about $14). Perfect.
I sat down to fill out the standard health form, sipping on refreshing cold tea that offered a brief respite from the Vietnamese heat. One of the women led me up the stairs to the treatment room. Looking at the staircase, I couldn't help but remember those same 5 floors I'd climbed in my Hanoi building, but this time, instead of dread and effort, I just laughed. It's amazing how context changes everything – same height, completely different feeling.
I received a soft, comfortable robe, and the kind woman washed my feet in warm water mixed with an aromatic blend of leaves that released an intoxicating tea scent. The masseuse directed me to lie on my stomach, and after a few moments of adjustment, she began her work.
This was probably the best massage I've ever had in my life. I'm not writing about it without reason – there's something about the Vietnamese technique that combines depth and gentleness in a way I've never experienced before.
When I turned onto my back, the masseuse placed a warm pillow on my shoulders and another on my forehead. I felt the heat penetrating, melting tensions I didn't know were there. The touch on my head was exactly what I needed – both soothing and deep at the same time.
As the treatment progressed came the surprising part. Despite clarifying upfront that I wasn't interested in Thai massage (I don't connect with the feeling of limbs being pulled in different directions), the masseuse decided that's exactly what I needed. I felt like the universe itself was whispering to me: "You don't always get what you want, but what you need." I heard clicks from places in my body I didn't know could make sounds. Despite my initial reluctance, I had to admit I felt better afterward, as if something stuck in my body had finally released.
During the massage, I found myself sinking into thoughts. This always happens to me during treatments – these moments of inner quiet bring a flood of new ideas and insights. It's one of the reasons I love massages so much – the inward dive that simultaneously allows me to see the bigger picture of my life.
Similar to showering or a long drive, these are moments when the clearest, sharpest thoughts emerge. The problem is I have no way to document them in real time, so I just hope to remember. Sometimes I do, sometimes thoughts return a day or two later, and sometimes they disappear completely.
This time, fortunately, I remembered.
What was particularly interesting is that instead of focusing on myself, my thoughts, my life, I was lying there on the treatment bed thinking about the woman massaging me. I wondered what her day looks like – does she enjoy the work? Has she been doing this for years? How does she pass the time when there are no clients?
Then I thought about the tattoo on my back. I wondered if she prefers to massage people with tattoos because then she has something to "read" during work. Maybe it makes her day more interesting than looking at smooth, unmarked skin.
This reminded me of a post I published recently about the white beach in Mualbul, where I described playing with fish. Someone commented something that stuck with me: she wrote that I think about the fish more than about myself.
And then something became clear about myself – it really is in my nature to think about how others see life. Even though I always share my perspective openly and honestly, what truly interests me is how others experience the same reality.
It took me years to understand that we all see the world in completely different ways. We can look at the same landscape and feel different things. It depends on everything that makes us who we are – from where we grew up, through the experiences we've had, to how we learned to interpret reality.
These filters through which we see the world have become one of the things that fascinate me most. I'm naturally drawn to knowing filters different from my own, because each one expands my understanding of reality.
That's why I always find myself thinking about lives different from mine – how people grow up in different parts of the world, what worries fill their worlds, what occupies them in daily life, and what dreams drive them.
Perhaps this is one of the reasons I love wandering the world so much. Not just to see new places, but mainly to glimpse for a moment into the worlds of people whose reality is so different from mine. Because ultimately, maybe the best way to understand myself is through the eyes of others.
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Thank you for being part of this journey.
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